Filiae Melioris Aevi.
Why does MSN not work?
Its like a curse!
Everytime I get PC time, something goes wrong.
A suitable reaction would be "Psh."
Today was farewell assembly.
I didn't cry. Not a tear. I almost feel guilty.
I laughed an awful lot, and coughed even more
but i didn't cry.
I did feel horrible about the fact that we have 2 more days left in RGS though. I've been here 4 years, but it seems like so much longer. It seems like I never was anywhere else.
Sec one- barely knew anybody. I was the skinniest idiot in the world, and I tried to make up for it with other things. Needless to say, I failed, and made more enemies than i did friends. I hated this year, although I didn't realise that until much later. I was vicious.
Sec two- the year went by very fast. I wasn't very stable. Mentally, Emotionally, anything. I had friends, finally, and it felt good. The year was alright, but I was not.
Sec three- a horrible year. the worst i've ever had. but 308 was a fantastic class, and i was glad to be a part of it. i was glad to have stable friends, and i think i must have earned as much of their hatred as i did love them. I was as unstable as they were stable. I hardly even want to think about it. I'm just glad the year got over. Cochin was brilliant, though.
Sec four- fantastic year. I finally got it. I finally understood. And I finally worked. It paid off, more or less. I think i stabilised. Maybe a bit to much at times, but i think i balanced myself out more or less. Mended friendships, sorted out my life. Found myself, you could say.
And suddenly- I've become a part of the Class of 2005, I'm not a Sec Four anymore.
):
I must add this in-
I'm sorry to anyone I have hurt, physically or emotionally over the years. I have been a bitch at times, but i hope you will forgive me. I am working towards change. I've got a blueprint for change being worked out, in the pages of my notebook. Solid plans. Things like how i have to talk less and listen more, how I have to be more serious, and not just laugh all the time. Not everything is about laughter anymore.
I'm sorry if i said words that hurt you, to Sindhu, Shrew, Sushma, and Dee especially. i can recall particular incidences i have said horrible and hurtful things to you. I realise now, that instead of wishing everyone else would change, if i had looked at myself a little more, we could all have been happier. I was unreasonable, and i apologise.
I'm sorry if i have generally been a pain in the butt. please tell me, and i will be willing to change. I can be a hypocrite at times, and i will try to change that. But please don't bitch about me. I hate it when people do that, and find that very difficult to forgive. Especially if you consider yourself my friend.
I do this sometimes too, and i disgust myelf. I am making efforts to reduce it, and I think i can. Just work with me.
And thank you to everyone who has put up with me, everyone in the Class of 2005.
to The Koottam [i will do a more detailed thank you to all of you in another entry]: for being such supportive friends through the years. For putting up with me in m most annoying times, and for being absolutely frank with me. I don't know ayone else who would have been this patient with me, and i thank you all so much for that.
To Jay: Thank you for Cochin. Thank you for dances in the rain. Thank you for bus stop talks. Thank you for underwear pictures. Thank you for everything, I don't know if i've ever told you how much you mean to me.
To Shree: Thank you for Cochin. For always making me laugh, heartlessly and without second thought. Thank you for listening to me talk, and for gushing with me over the same people. For bus rides, as short as they may be. For photo chechis, and don't call me chechis. You mean a lot to me too shree, though I may not always show it the way i want to.
To Vania: Thanks for hating me. I'll always take Shit to be an endearing term. Always. and I will always reciprocate with love, vania. :)
To Huiting: Beverly Hills! Thats where i wanna be! :) Thanks for filling me in when i slept in class, for laughing at all my nonsense, for always asking me if i was alright. No thanks for the horrible massages, but thanks for trying anyway. Thank you for wonderful memories, I'm very glad I got to know you.
To Vanessa: For white polo shirts and philo lessons. For rolling your eyes at everything i said, and for laughing uncontrollably although you tried very hard to hide it at times. You know you want to man. Just let it out.
To Olivia: For all the fun we had during art lessons, and for all the times you asked me if i was alright when i wasn't so alright. Thanks for just being there. I'll never forget you olives.:)
To the RGS graduating batch of 2005:
We've been through more than our fair share of everything. Its hard to believe its all over, but I'm glad i spent it with the people i did. We're brilliant, we truly are.
Filiae Melioris Aevi.
Daughters of a Better Age.
Its like a curse!
Everytime I get PC time, something goes wrong.
A suitable reaction would be "Psh."
Today was farewell assembly.
I didn't cry. Not a tear. I almost feel guilty.
I laughed an awful lot, and coughed even more
but i didn't cry.
I did feel horrible about the fact that we have 2 more days left in RGS though. I've been here 4 years, but it seems like so much longer. It seems like I never was anywhere else.
Sec one- barely knew anybody. I was the skinniest idiot in the world, and I tried to make up for it with other things. Needless to say, I failed, and made more enemies than i did friends. I hated this year, although I didn't realise that until much later. I was vicious.
Sec two- the year went by very fast. I wasn't very stable. Mentally, Emotionally, anything. I had friends, finally, and it felt good. The year was alright, but I was not.
Sec three- a horrible year. the worst i've ever had. but 308 was a fantastic class, and i was glad to be a part of it. i was glad to have stable friends, and i think i must have earned as much of their hatred as i did love them. I was as unstable as they were stable. I hardly even want to think about it. I'm just glad the year got over. Cochin was brilliant, though.
Sec four- fantastic year. I finally got it. I finally understood. And I finally worked. It paid off, more or less. I think i stabilised. Maybe a bit to much at times, but i think i balanced myself out more or less. Mended friendships, sorted out my life. Found myself, you could say.
And suddenly- I've become a part of the Class of 2005, I'm not a Sec Four anymore.
):
I must add this in-
I'm sorry to anyone I have hurt, physically or emotionally over the years. I have been a bitch at times, but i hope you will forgive me. I am working towards change. I've got a blueprint for change being worked out, in the pages of my notebook. Solid plans. Things like how i have to talk less and listen more, how I have to be more serious, and not just laugh all the time. Not everything is about laughter anymore.
I'm sorry if i said words that hurt you, to Sindhu, Shrew, Sushma, and Dee especially. i can recall particular incidences i have said horrible and hurtful things to you. I realise now, that instead of wishing everyone else would change, if i had looked at myself a little more, we could all have been happier. I was unreasonable, and i apologise.
I'm sorry if i have generally been a pain in the butt. please tell me, and i will be willing to change. I can be a hypocrite at times, and i will try to change that. But please don't bitch about me. I hate it when people do that, and find that very difficult to forgive. Especially if you consider yourself my friend.
I do this sometimes too, and i disgust myelf. I am making efforts to reduce it, and I think i can. Just work with me.
And thank you to everyone who has put up with me, everyone in the Class of 2005.
to The Koottam [i will do a more detailed thank you to all of you in another entry]: for being such supportive friends through the years. For putting up with me in m most annoying times, and for being absolutely frank with me. I don't know ayone else who would have been this patient with me, and i thank you all so much for that.
To Jay: Thank you for Cochin. Thank you for dances in the rain. Thank you for bus stop talks. Thank you for underwear pictures. Thank you for everything, I don't know if i've ever told you how much you mean to me.
To Shree: Thank you for Cochin. For always making me laugh, heartlessly and without second thought. Thank you for listening to me talk, and for gushing with me over the same people. For bus rides, as short as they may be. For photo chechis, and don't call me chechis. You mean a lot to me too shree, though I may not always show it the way i want to.
To Vania: Thanks for hating me. I'll always take Shit to be an endearing term. Always. and I will always reciprocate with love, vania. :)
To Huiting: Beverly Hills! Thats where i wanna be! :) Thanks for filling me in when i slept in class, for laughing at all my nonsense, for always asking me if i was alright. No thanks for the horrible massages, but thanks for trying anyway. Thank you for wonderful memories, I'm very glad I got to know you.
To Vanessa: For white polo shirts and philo lessons. For rolling your eyes at everything i said, and for laughing uncontrollably although you tried very hard to hide it at times. You know you want to man. Just let it out.
To Olivia: For all the fun we had during art lessons, and for all the times you asked me if i was alright when i wasn't so alright. Thanks for just being there. I'll never forget you olives.:)
To the RGS graduating batch of 2005:
We've been through more than our fair share of everything. Its hard to believe its all over, but I'm glad i spent it with the people i did. We're brilliant, we truly are.
Filiae Melioris Aevi.
Daughters of a Better Age.
posted by sedder at 9:52 pm
7 Comments:
you've had a wonderful smashing year, i see.
i hope you keep all these friends, and find many more, coz you are the only person in the world i know, who deserves friends.
i love you
hmm.. as usual people realise in the end of all their faults. But, do u consider this to be THE END??
End of road to all schoolie mates??
no, as a matter of fact i don't.
and i doubt it will be.
Then whythe hell are you asking for pardon?? Haven't u ever heard.... NO THANK Qs' AND NO SORRYs IN FRIENDSHIP!!!
i dont subscribe to that.
i still think that everyone needs to seek forgiveness when they've done something wrong.
when people stop doing that in the name of friendship, the world becomes too complacent.
remember how you said that learning from the past is integral for a successful future?
same here. exactly the same thing. learning, and seeking forgiveness. because no man is an island. and no matter how happy i am with myself, if the people around me are not pleased with me, there is no point in my own happiness.
friends=ppl who actually understand u well. Not any tom dick and harry!! For ppl who know u well.. they would have understood that u really meant no offence.
Leaning from past... ya. Forgiveness, is like feeling guilty! guilty=not the right way!!
More over seeking forgiveness immediately after you do something wrong is fine but in the end, =guilt feeling.
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